Last week the toilet in the kid’s bathroom became mysteriously clogged. I should mention that my middle daughter has been spotted with toilet paper practically wrapped around her like a mummy at any given toilet time. She has been asked and told on several occasions not to use so much because the toilet could possibly get clogged…blah blah blah. I sound like a broken record. I should probably add in that my little guy is no stranger to the toilet paper either. So we do have a dilemma on our hands. But things happen and we try to take them in stride…most of the time.
Well, this particular time that the toilet was clogged I was unable to unclog it with the usual methods. Of course my husband was traveling and wouldn’t be home for two days and being a good wife I really didn’t want him to have to come home to that. So I plunged and plunged to no avail. I finally called my husband and asked him if there was anything else I could do before calling in the professionals. He told me he actually had a special tool in the garage for these things and if I wanted to try it would probably work. I gave it the old college try, but when my hands started to feel bruised I finally gave up. And so I did what every mom home alone with three kids would do. I closed the door and waited for dad to come home.
When he finally came home, he was able to do the impossible and all was right on the home front again. Or was it?
During those 2 days I asked the kids if they thought maybe, just maybe, they used too much and it was ok to say if they were the one who did the deed. I wasn’t mad – I just wanted to know. Nothing. I heard nothing for 2 days. I started to stew about no one coming clean. So that night I asked them again. They all claimed they didn’t use that bathroom. Well, I can attest that someone most certainly did use that bathroom. There was nothing else I could do, but let it go.
Fast forward a week and it is – you guessed it…clogged again. I said, “That’s it!” Someone must pay.” And I meant it. I sat the kids down and I told them they were going to have to pay to get a plumber.
Lucky for them my husband came to their rescue again and it was fixed. But the next morning I got this letter from my middle daughter:
May 8, 2011
Dear Mom and Dad,
Thank you so much for
fixing the bathroom toilet,
that must have ben
disgusting! I’m so sorry!
I will definitely reward you
guys for that!!!! I wish someone
would’ve told the truth. But
we’re over that now, so let’s
not talk about that. Oh, by the way
Happy Mother’s Day!!!
I love you guys both so much,
more than you can imagen!!!!!!!
And on the back she attached a 20 dollar bill.
I live about half an hour away from where I went to school, and even though 30 or so miles isn’t far, in this small state, it’s like another world. I never see anyone I went to school with.
Imagine my surprise, while shopping with my 2 youngest at a local gift shop, to spot someone I remembered from school. Someone I don’t remember well. We certainly weren’t friends. But, we did go to school together. And, since I’m a grown up now, and I try to be a good person, I thought, “I’ll just catch her eye and say hello.” So, I did just that. Well almost that. I caught her eye alright, her STINK EYE. She gave me the stink eye! We’re forty-something year olds. We don’t give the stink eye. We say hello. I decided that was that, enough of me trying to be Miss Nice Girl and started to leave. As I attempted to gather my children, my little guy had a full on meltdown, kicking off shoes and everything. By the time I managed to escape, I’m sure Stink Eye knew exactly who I was.
Fast forward a few months and my little guy has just started preschool. I was really enjoying that 2 hour and fifteen minutes to myself – maybe a little too much – and was running late for pick up one day. There was no time to wait for the elevator, so I took to the stairs, running. Just as I reached the second floor landing, SPLAT! I fell flat on my face. No sooner had I landed, the door opened, and Stink Eye walked out. AND STEPPED OVER ME.
Well, that was about enough of that. So that’s how it was gonna be – she was going to pretend she didn’t even know me. Fine by me.
A few years have gone by since, and I’ve seen her here and there and no big deal. Until a few weeks ago when I attended a seminar and she was there. Stink Eye and me, in the same 2 and a half hour seminar. So, being the grown up I am, I immediately texted to the other Minivan Mom that Stink Eye was there. But, instead of using Stink Eye, I used her real name. Her whole name. And I ended my text with “shoot me now.”
Not a big deal, right? Not until later on that evening when I realized that my friend had not responded, so I wrote on her Facebook wall. Here’s what transpired:
Me: Did you get my text? I may blog about that experience.
Other Minivan Mom: No I did not get your text. Did you send it to ME? Haha. What experience?
Me: Great – maybe it wasn’t you. Crap! I used LAST NAMES and everything!
Me: I knew I shouldn’t have taken up texting.
Other Minivan Mom: Uh oh! I just double checked and sorry but I got nothin!
Me: Now I can’t even find my flippin’ phone. Picture me in a full on freak out right now!
Other Minivan Mom: Got it.
Other Minivan Mom: I mean I got the image in my head, Not your text.
Other Minivan Mom: Calm down and breathe.
Me: Wait, when I called you this afternoon, was that home or cell?
Other Minivan Mom: I don’t remember. I can’t remember 5 minutes ago.
So here’s the moral to this story. You don’t have to be Miss Nice Girl all of the time just because you’re a grown up, but if you’re still gonna pass notes (ie texts) like you’re in junior high, just make sure they get where they’re supposed to be. And, never, ever, use real names.