sometimes sarcastic sometimes sincere

Everyday questions that run through a

Minivan Mom’s mind…

 

  • I never get out of the car and accidentally leave the door open, why do they?
  • Who takes a shower and forgets to wash their body?
  • How long ’til bedtime?
  • Do we have wine?
  • How did this place get to be such a mess?
  • Do the kids purposely leave a trail of toys wherever they go – to find their way back?
  • When my husband’s been working long hours everyone feels so sorry for him – “He’s working so hard!  He must be tired!”  Um, remember me?  I’m the one picking up the slack here and I don’t have any employees to give me a hand.  Why doesn’t anyone ever think it’s hard on me?
  • How long ’til bedtime?
  • Do we have wine?
  • How did this place get to be such a mess?
  • How come sometimes six kids can feel like one, and other times one kid feels like six?
  • When I call the kids to empty the dishwasher, they can never hear me.  Why then, when I take a treat out of the freezer do they seem to have bionic ears?
  • How come as soon as extra money comes in something big totally bites the dust?
  • Toothbrushing will become a priority for them someday, right?
  • Why do kids always fall asleep when you don’t want them to instead of when you want them too?
  • When is my day off?
  • How long ’til bedtime?
  • Do we have wine?
  • How did this place get to be such a mess?
  • Why does the dishwasher always have to be emptied when the kids are at school?  Isn’t that what chores are for?
  • How come my family never rushes out to help with the groceries like they do on tv?
  • What if I never turned their clothes right side out when I folded them?  Would they wear them that way?  Or (genius!) fix them themselves?
  • Since when do I have to add “from today” to the phrase “are those socks clean?”
  • The lady who works at the packy said hi to me at Homegoods today.  Is that because I’m in there so often or because I really butchered the name of the wine I was looking for the other night?  (I’m going with option “B”.)
  • How come all of the music I like is on the oldies station now?
  • Does the stress I incur while psyching myself up for my workout  burn any calories?
  • Why is it that when the kids sleep in, I wake up early?
  • How long ’til bedtime?
  • Do we have wine?
  • How did this place get to be such a mess?
  • ?
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